I read the article 'My teenage daughter told me she is pregnant' by Kimesha Walters. I empathise with the young lady's mother. However, I would just like to encourage her to stand by her daughter because she needs her now.

Also, I am recommending that the young lady be enrolled in the pogramme offered to adolescent pregnant girls by the Women's Centre of Jamaica Foundation, located at 42 Trafalgar Road, Kingston 10. Contact numbers are: 929-7608, 906-1607 and 929-3512.

This programme addresses the problems of interrupted education and other social problems that occur as a result of teenage pregnancy.

Her mother will also receive counselling to help deal with the situation.

Judith Jaggon

Executive secretary

Women's Centre of Jamaica

Foundation

As a single mother of two high school girls, one at Campion College and one at Immaculate Conception High School, I suppose I would pull my hair out. I would think I failed as a mother, but maybe the treatment would have been the same for me. Loving your child means accepting her mistakes.

Can 'a good mother' neglect her child in her time of need? Of course, I would say I would put her out, but put her out to where and to whom? On the streets, not knowing what she is doing and where she is? At some point though, we have to draw the line.

At what point?

I extend my congratulations even to this mother in her time of distress and disappointment. I can only pray for her to forgive her child and to continue to offer her hand of support.

Novelette Howell

novhow@yahoo.com

It is alarming to see the rate at which teenagers are becoming pregnant nowadays. You would expect to see teenage girls going through their books instead.

In my opinion, this problem occurs for a number of reasons.

1. The girl does not have high self-esteem. Research has shown that teenage girls with low self-esteem tend to have sex earlier than girls with high self-esteem. They think very little of themselves and will allow any boy to do anything to them. In such a case, I would sit down with my daughter and explain to her that she is a beautiful creation of God and should treat herself as such.

2. Curiosity. Many parents do not take the time to talk to their daughter about sex. The daughter, in turn, goes to school and other places where she is given the wrong information or is pressured by friends. She hears stories and, wanting to try it for herself, has intercourse. In that case, I would apologise to her for not giving her the proper training she should have got, and really talk to her about the whole issue.

3. Rebellion. The girl is angry because she feels her parents are 'boring', 'ruining her life', and so, to show that she can take care of herself, that she is responsible enough, she goes and has sex. In that situation, I would let her live in the house, but I am no longer her father. I may seem cruel but, after all, I took the time to explain and warn her but because she is an 'adult', well, she can manage on her own. She became 'grown', therefore, I am no longer needed.

Shekinah Ade-Gold

shekygold@hotmail

In response to Mark who said that he would give his daughter two choices - 1. abortion, 2. abortion, Sasha D wrote:

I am so sad that the only way you see out of this dilemma is an abortion. Do you realise that you are talking about a life? And, don't you think that in such a case, upset as you would be, your daughter would still have a right to decide what to do with her child?

So, what if she refuses to have an abortion, would you then throw her and her unborn child out on to the streets?

Yesterday, I shared my own story of getting pregnant at 17, and how the love, support and encouragement of Mom helped me through it all. At the time it seemed I had made a monstrous mistake, and I cried endlessly, because I had let my parents down. Dad wouldn't even talk to me! He was so upset!

But when my precious little son was born, he became the 'apple of my father's eye'. And, he has grown into one very special, handsome young man. Thank the Lord, Mark, my father, did not hand me such an ultimatum: abortion or abortion.

Moms and Dads, if your teenage daughter finds herself pregnant, at least give her the chance to decide what she wants to do with her pregnancy and offer your love and support. Getting pregnant and having an 'early' baby is a difficult pill to swallow but it is definitely not the end of the world.

Sasha D.

sasD75@aol.com

Anne had a thing or two to say to Mark as well:

Abortion can lead to post-abortion traumatic stress, for example depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, prolonged grief over the lost baby, inability to continue studies, emotional distress and even suicide.

A link with increased risk of breast cancer in women who have had an abortion has been reported by medical research. Also, physical harm endured during an abortion may lead to infertility.

It happened to my daughter and I wish that on no one, not even om my worst enemy.

Think before you seek an 'easy' solution. It may just lead to a string of unexpected, greater problems. These problems are tougher than raising your first grandchild.

Anne

amecarthur@yahoo.com

All of you guys are talking bull. You should close the gate before the horse goes through it. Teach your young daughters, starting at age 10, about sex and boys and all the complications it can and will bring, instead of talking about how to close the gate once the horse has gone through it.

We should work to prevent these things. If we teach them prevention, we wont have to talk about throwing them out and abortions.

There is another reality that some parents will not acknowledge: come what may, they can't stop their teenage daughters from having sex. Unless they are with them 24/7.

So, that's why they need to support and encourage them on how to take care of themselves, if, and when, it happens.

Bob

HOTSHOT_TARGET_5

@HOTMAIL.COM