Oxy Moron, Contributor

Sunday morning, and the board floor glistened. The scent of Genie floor polish permeated the air in the entire house.

In the living room, we were having a delectable breakfast of callaloo and hard-dough bread, with hot home-made chocolate drink. Lively gospel music blared from the AM/FM battery radio, as we chatted about and laughed at our latest family drama.

Suddenly, we heard a most horrendous noise coming from next door. We became silent and listened. It was getting closer and closer to our yard. It was a heart-wrenching wail. Papa turned the radio's volume down, and we rushed out to the veranda, just in time to see when Mrs White jumped over the fence into our yard. She landed with a thud, wailing and crying uncontrollably.

"Woee, woee, woee!" she shouted, "See dem deh, 10 black puss a run affa mi. Woee! Woee! See dem deh!" Frightened, we looked, and looked, and there were no 'pusses', black or white. By now, she had scaled the steps leading into our house and sailed past us, through the living room and into Mama's bedroom.

We were right behind her. She continued, "See dem deh! See dem deh! Woee, help me, 10 black puss, 10 black puss!" It was under Mama's big trunk bed that she had ended up. We crowded into the room. I found a corner from which to watch the unfolding excitement. I wanted so very much to see those pusses. Where were they?

No puss in sight

Her husband then came in and so did some other neighbours. They tried to talk her out, but nobody could. And she bawled and bawled, saying that the 10 black pusses were under the bed with her. Still, we did not see any puss pass us. We shifted the bed, but she moved with it. We then removed the mattress exposing her, and that was when she cried some more and covered her face. I looked at her through the spring base. I felt the laughter coming, my heart was about to explode. But I could not laugh. That would have been rude. I was dying inside though. Papa then fetched his spanner and screwdrivers. Piece by piece the bed was dismantled. By now her husband had got a piece of rope. When the bed was finally pulled apart, the men grabbed and attempted to tie her, but she was too strong, and now sweating profusely. She shouted to the men, "Puss, puss, puss! Unoo leave mi alone!"

"Woee, woee!" she bellowed, as she fought the 'pusses' off. Finally, they got the upper hand and tied her hands and feet. "Murder, murder, 10 black puss!" she screamed as they removed her from Mama's bedroom.

On the veranda, they held her while they rested. As they were about to descend the stairs, Mama asked her husband what was wrong with her. Everybody was now waiting for the answer, which he took forever to give. Then he said embarrassingly, "A some ganja tea mi did give har this morning."

And I could not keep it in any longer!

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