Dear Counsellor:

I have just received bad news from the doctor. I have been diagnosed with leukaemia and feel bewildered and confused. I don't know what to say or what to do.

- Carol

Dear Carol:

It is always difficult to deal with a diagnosis of cancer. One needs time to adjust and adapt to such a diagnosis. You need to make a list of questions that you would like your doctor to answer. Some of the pertinent questions are:

1) Are there complications from the cancer?

2) Can my family members also have this type of cancer?

3) What types of treatment are available?

4) Is there a possibility of cure?There are many other questions that you will want to ask. There are many myths about the different types of cancer, so you should feel free to discuss this with your doctor. Get a close friend or family member to accompany you to the doctor. You need to build a close relationship with your doctor so that you can feel comfortable discussing health issues.

Eat healthy

Diet is important as you need to eat healthily to maintain your strength. You will need to discuss your nutritional needs with your doctor and a nutritionist. Spirituality is important as you need to put God in the centre of your life. You need to pray daily and to ask others to pray for you.

After the initial shock has worn off, you may gradually get depressed. Depression needs to be treated aggressively as this may affect your ability to function well and make decisions. Treatment for depression is available and you can benefit from cognitive therapy and medications. You need to become aware of the symptoms of depre-ssion. You may start to worry a lot, stop eating or sleeping well, become fatigued and suicidal.

Support systems are important and you need to take close friends and family into your confidence. Feel free to ask for help from your family and friends.

You will need to accept the adjustments that will take place and give yourself time to mourn your losses and to cope with the changes in your life. In some places, there are support groups that will provide information and strategies to cope. Sharing your problems and being optimistic about the management of the cancer will go a long way to improve your outcome.

Dear Counsellor:

Alzheimer's disease seemed to be a common problem among the elderly. My husband has Alzheimer's disease and it is a strain on the family.

- Mary

Dear Mary:

Alzheimer's is a common problem among senior citizens. Many families are affected and it causes stress on the primary caregiver. It can affect males and females, and the spouses and children or siblings have a difficult time in coping. Many family members can get depressed, worried or concerned about their loved ones. To see an individual deteriorate before your eyes and you cannot reverse the condition is very painful to the heart. In the later stages of the disease, the affected individual is unable to attend to his daily activities and personal hygiene. After a while, the individual doesn't recognise his relatives or close friends. In the early stages, his long-term memory is preserved and he may get depressed about his condition.

Burden them

There are medications that can slow the progression of the disease and improve functioning. There are professional caregivers who are skilled in the care of patients with Alzheimer's disease. They can give relief to family members who care for their relatives. Family members who take care of their relatives daily can get 'burnt out', and the caretaking becomes a burden to them. It is good to get respite from the daily work.

There are associations that are set up to provide support and information to families of patients with Alzheimer's. When you are informed about what to expect and what possible strategies to use, then the battle is half won. When you are going through stressful times, it is helpful to have other shoulders to lean on. There is a lot of information available on the Internet which you will find helpful in your daily activities.