Despite a heavy downpour on Tuesday, several vendors and shoppers went about their regular business in East Parade, downtown Kingston.

Bustling crowds and vendors in downtown Kingston

There's trouble brewing inside a one-stop wholesale near Parade in downtown Kingston. It's a small, dark room with a pungent aroma that was not unlike that of sweaty feet. Pauletta and Donisha, both from nearby communities, have spotted a pair of jeans tacked to a wall. Attached to the pants is an orange price tag with $900 scribbled on it.

"Hello Mr Chin! Mek mi see dah pants yah! Same size!" said Pauletta. She was talking to a fair-skinned Asian man behind the counter. He looked her over then chuckled and went into a back room. There was little mystery as to why the man chuckled. Pauletta's rotund frame suggested she was not one to skip a meal and the pants she requested were tiny in comparison to her well-pronounced legs.

Purple wig

It was then that Donisha walked in. She was wearing a purple wig and shoes with straps that went all the way up to her knees. "Hello, bring one fi me, too," she said to the man going into the back room. Her eyes were covered with very dark sunglasses and she kept shifting the frame on her nose. In a minute, the man came back to the counter.

His English was shaky. "Wee no have no more," he said to Donisha, while handing Pauletta a pair. She took it from him and looked it over. "Den a how she a look pan it den?" Donisha shouted. The man looked upset. "Dat is dee last one wee have," he said.

"Yuh fi gimmi dat one my girl, for as mi look pan yuh mi know yuh caan hold inna dat," Donisha quipped. Pauletta was peeved now.

"Hey gyal, is who yuh a renk wid? A my size dis!" she retorted. "Your size? Not even yuh likkle toe caan hold inna dat!" Donisha pressed. From there, things got worse and the two traded insults involving family members and body parts for no less than five minutes before the man behind the counter intervened. And he was not pleased.

"Hello! Hello! Dee two of you stop noise now! Yuh a mek too much noise. Left dee place man!" he shouted to them. This intervention united the two women in a common cause and dramatically shifted the premise of the argument.

Small fellow

We a customer. Yuh fi have mannas!" she shouted to the man behind the counter.

Though he was a small fellow with narrow shoulders he reached over the counter and grabbed the pair of pants right out of Pauletta's robust hands. "You leave place now! You no come back no more!" said he.

"Gweh, Chiney man!" Donisha yelled.

"Gweh back!" the chap retorted, flashing them off with his hand.

"Hee, Hee!" I snickered in what I thought was the relative safety of a few feet away.

"Ah wah yuh a laugh bout?" Pauletta had spotted me. "I ... er ... I," I mumbled. "Dee whole of you leave place now," said the Asian man behind the counter. Somehow, I had got caught up in the squabble that was unfolding. "Yes, you leave place too. Leave place now," said he.

My protests were futile. Shocked at the indignity of it all, I hobbled outside with the two women in tow. They, however, were having a hearty laugh at my expense. "Woi young bway! Di Chiney man run yuh outa him place!" Donisha laughed. "Hee, Hee," was Pauletta's contribution. So, despite the confrontation that occurred between the two, minutes earlier, Donisha and Pauletta were now the best of friends. "Mi a go over Orange Street. Dem might have the same thing. Come wid mi if yuh want," said Donisha, and she and Pauletta walked off in unity. Meanwhile, I stood there unable to move for a while, still dazed by the events that had just unfolded around me.

robert.lalah@gleanerjm.com

Shopping in downtown Kingston can cause one to become a little testy. - file photos