Oxy Moron, Contributor

Life can be bittersweet, and the things you talk and sing about can return to haunt you and manifest themselves in strange ways. For instance, look at Rihanna, the Bajan, who has been making a name for herself internationally, more for her looks than for her singing talent. She got involved with another hype called Chris Brown, who from now on is renamed Piranha.

You know that vicious little fish that lives in the rivers of South America? With its sharp teeth, it can mangle its victim in seconds. Think of it, and think of Chris Brown, and think about how Haunted Rihanna is by the songs she tried to sing. Here is the latest remix:

There's A Thug in My Life who recently sent me to the Emergency Room, for he was Unfaithful. As We Ride I said I wanted to Break It Off. He called me Selfish Girl and A Girl Like Me isn't. So I said Shut Up and Drive! I Hate That I Love You. Then, it was Boom! Boom! It was like a Hurricane. Put it Pon De Replay. Boom! Boom! S.O.S. (Rescue Me). Now, the Question Existing is, who is the other woman?

I am now living in Disturbia, Breaking Dishes, but I am Willing To Wait, I am in no Rush. That La, La, La … Please Don't Stop The Music, because Kisses Don't Lie. Why Am I So In Love? It wasn't the First Time, and certainly won't be The Last Time. So all Dem Haters can stay there. We haven't said our Final Goodbye. It's about this Crazy Little Thing Called Love. He is The One, so Don't Even Try to get between us. Here I Go Again. Now, where is my Umbrella? Rehab, here I come! Good Girl Gone Bad.

P.S. I'm still Not Over You, Piranha, but If I Never See Your Face Again, Take A Bow, and Live Your Life in prison.

oxydmoron@gmail.com