Haunted house? Who knows ...

"Don't go there alone," she said slowly, a serious look on her wrinkled face. She held on to my arm as she spoke and stared into my eyes.

It was a chilling moment for me, and I felt a trickle of sweat fall from my brow as I looked down the roadway and into the distance. There was nothing on either side of the lonely road but green bushes and a few willowing trees. It was mid-afternoon and a strong wind was ruffling the leaves of the trees. Otherwise, there was silence.

"Don't go there alone. You just believe what mi tell yuh and stay fur from dat place! Is pure evil in there! Don't go there alone, or we might not hear nothing more about yuh!," she warned.

Haunted house

I swallowed hard and silently wondered why I hadn't stayed home that day. Inside a musty little shop in Brae's River, St Elizabeth, Miss Margaret was telling me of a shaky old house about a mile away which, some people say, is haunted.

"Haunted? Mi nuh know 'bout dat, Pa! But what mi telling yuh is dat dem people seh dem see duppy in there; so if duppy in there, den yuh need fi stay far," Miss Margaret said.

She declared herself a devout follower of Christ and an elder at the local Mount Zion Baptist church.

She said her fellow members of the flock had also heard stories of voices and blood-chilling screams coming from the building at night and had so come to the conclusion that the house was the home of evil.

Into the shop walked a burly, old man called, Moochie. I didn't have time to question the name before he joined the conversation.

"Ah lie dem a tell, Miss Margaret! Mi nuh 'fraid a dem place deh. Nothing nuh inna di house! Ah just dem igle bwoy a tell lie," he said, looking at me quizzically.

Now, ordinarily, I'd have a hard time buying anything someone who calls himself Moochie and wears a turtleneck sweater in the summer has to say, but today, I was hoping with all my heart that Moochie knew what he was talking about. I realise now that it was perhaps against better judgement, but I had already come this far; I had to see the house for myself.

So, hesitantly, I asked Moochie if he would be averse to accompanying me to the supposedly haunted abode.

He stuttered for a moment, but after glancing at Miss Margaret, who gave him a 'yes, mi know yuh 'fraid like puss' look, he agreed.

"Yeah, man, for nothing nuh inna di house. Is pure lie," said he.

Dismissal of claims

I was somewhat comforted for a second by the man's apparent dismissal of the claims that the house was occupied by the spirit of the undead, but then, I again got the jitters when he walked up to the counter of the shop and asked Lelith, the shopkeeper, for a "drink a white rum".

With a final warning from Miss Margaret and an invitation to attend church on Sunday "to be cleansed of evil", we were off.

It was a long walk, made more interminable by Moochie's complaints of having gas pains and a terrible case of diarrhea the week before.

"It draw mi down bad, bad! Whole night it trouble mi," said he.

I tried to look disinterested, but he went on to tell me in intricate detail of the previous times he had stomach trouble and how, funnily enough, it had served to make him more potent, in other areas. Needless to say, I was actually thankful when, finally, we got to the haunted house.

There was nobody around. In fact, we had not seen anyone since we had left the shop, other than a tired looking donkey across the road that was making some strange noises and shaking its head violently.

Screechy sound

Moochie and I both stopped to look at the house. It was partially hidden in some thick bushes and was perched on the side of a hill. Some of the windows were broken out and it had a rusting, zinc roof.

The wind was shaking the zinc, making a screechy sound, and I took a couple steps back. I asked Moochie why he wasn't going any closer.

"Mi? Den wah mek yuh nuh go closer?" he said.

I didn't answer and we both stood there looking at the house for another minute or so, before Moochie pushed me closer.

"Galang man. Nothing nuh inna it," said he. The sun was still out, and I figured that if there were any ghosts, they wouldn't be coming out until night anyway, so I inched closer to the building.

As I got closer, I smelled something funny. With every step I took, the bush under my shoes made a squishing sound and I turned back to look at Moochie, who, I swear, had taken a few steps back.

I shouted to him to join me.

"Yeah man, mi a come," he replied. He didn't move.

"Some help you are," I thought, and moved closer. I got to the building and peered inside. It was pretty much empty, except for a couple of cardboard boxes on the floor. There were several pieces of sponge also strewn about.

Nothing too strange, I thought. But then I saw it. It was a small, black ball curled up in a corner. It had a furry coat and I thought it was a cat.

But then it shook from side to side like jello on a plate and it didn't have any eyes. I nearly swallowed my tongue when I saw it and turned back to look for Moochie.

Apparently seeing the sheer terror in my eyes, he had now taken several steps in the direction from which we had come.

"Wah yuh see?" he shouted. "Yuh see di dup ...."

Loud noise

Boom! Moochie was cut off by a loud noise coming from the back of the house. Boom! With that, Moochie took off. I have never seen a man over 60 move that fast.

I was right on his heels, even though my feet got entangled in some of the bushes, I was out of there in seconds. The last I saw of Moochie, he had turned up a hill and was heading back home, shouting something about Lucifer and holy water.

I didn't stop to say goodbye, and we haven't had a chance since to discuss the strange events of that day. I may see him on Sunday, however, where I'll be present in the front pew at the Mount Zion Baptist church in Brae's River, St Elizabeth.

robert.lalah@gleanerjm.com

This church might be my only hope of getting cleansed. - Photos by Robert Lalah