Angela Philipps, Contributor

Fifty-two weeks ago, my article 'Relationship Resolutions for 2007' was published. This month I was thinking about those resolutions and whether I had stuck to them myself or not.

Here's a recap:

Resolutions for Women:

1. Unless there is something morally off about a man, accept all dates - you never know!

2. If a man treats you well on a first date, do something nice for him within a couple days. Cook him dinner, drop off a bottle of wine or cookies at his house. Men like to be treated well, and you'll be surprised how impressed he will be with the gesture.

3. Don't be too quick to brush off a man who comes along with some corny chat-up line like most guys, he's nervous and fears rejection, so give him a chance.

4. Ask at least one man out yourself - it's no easy task, but it'll make you appreciate the difficult position men are in.

5. When asked if you'd like to go out, suggest to him that you do something he likes to do - good to know and appreciate his interests from the get-go, as he'll never give them up.

Enjoyed the dates

So, I actually did go on a date with every man who asked me out. I cooked dinner and baked cookies many times over. I gave most men a second chance with the chat-up lines, apart from the one who was so overbearing I thought I'd have another stalker on hand!

However, this year I did not ask a guy out, but I did the year before. And I was lucky enough to enjoy all the dates I went on, whether they covered his interests or mine.

Resolutions for Men: (Please note that these are short and sweet).

1. Do not expect any form of sex after a first date!

2. Make more effort to tell a woman about what you are feeling - she can't read your mind.

3. Show interest in a woman's job/work. She'll have more respect for you.

4. Do not play hard to get unless you're still a teenager. Seriously!

5. Bathe regularly with good soap - women love a man who smells good.

Did the men I went out with follow their side of the bargain? Yes, they did. Or at least they gave that impression, which I guess is more to the point.

Did these resolutions help you in forming romantic relationships? Are there other aspects to consider when searching for a life partner? Of course, but are you looking for something serious or just a bit of fun?

Stop trying too hard

I have found that the best way to find a man is to stop looking and trying so hard. In all my years of being single I have been unsuccessful in the search for 'love' or 'lust' when I've been out on the prowl. That word makes me sound like a male dog looking for a bitch on heat! The moment I decide to chill out on the matter and just get on with my life is when out of the sky apparently falls a wonderful bloke.

Well, I don't mean that they literally drop from heaven, but some amazing fellow seemingly appears from nowhere and I'm never really sure how it happens. These don't all end happily ever after, but then I'd have little to write about if they did, wouldn't I?

Emotionally draining

But the desperate search is just so exhausting and emotionally draining. And in fact, if anything does arise from my mad anxiety, it usually seeps into these particular 'flings'. (Let's face it, that's exactly what they are), and causes such heartbreak and turmoil that I'm always left wondering whether it was really worth the effort and pain.

It's hardly surprising that so many negative jokes about male/female connections have been in circulation for years, and that many a man and woman complain about one another. Why are we trying so damned hard to please someone else at the detriment to our true self?

I guess what I am trying to say is relax, be cool, and that's how you'll get a better date in two thousand and eight.

angelaphilippsja@hotmail.com