Yahneake Sterling, Staff Reporter

Stephen Campbell and his girlfriend Naomi Brown moved in together shortly after she became pregnant.

The couple decided that sharing an apartment was more economical with a baby on the way.

"I saw where both of us could share the grocery bill because I wanted her to eat healthy also, I saw where we could share the rent and other utility bills," Stephen told Flair. "I wanted to be there for her to help her through her pregnancy as well."

Since moving in together just under two years now, the couple have discussed marriage but have come to the decision that they want to be home owners before they tie the knot.

Theirs is a tale of a type of union that has become quite common in Jamaica. 'Shacking up' no longer raises eyebrows. The practice also exists in the United States of America and England.

USATODAY.com reports that eight per cent of U.S. couples live together before marriage. One former resident of England told Flair that the practice is common in that country. "Culturally, there is no stigma, but some people shack up for welfare benefits," the former resident said. She added that the act is even encouraged by some parents who help their children to set up house together.

Two thirds cohabit

Marriage and family therapist Dr. Sydney McGill theorises that at least two thirds of the Jamaican society cohabit before marriage.

Not all cohabiting couples marry, but Nickeisha Mooreand Vaughn Whitehad their fairy tale ending.

The couple married in 2006, less than a year after they moved in together.

Nickeisha had graduated from college a year ahead of Vaughn and had relocated to St. James for a job. Later, when he finished college, he moved to live with her as he, too, got a job in that parish.

"We had been together for six years before we lived together and we always spoke of marriage," Nickeisha revealed.

"When I lived with him, I realised that I could do so for the rest of my life. He was clean and I liked that, he was humble and simple and didn't demand a great amount of cooking to be done," she added, noting that those months of cohabiting sealed the deal for marriage.

Permanent partner

Dr. McGill says cohabitation has become mainstream in today's society as a way to test or discover a persons suitability as a permanent partner, but each individual has a different reason for shacking up.

"I think shacking up for men is a way of getting ready sex; for women, it is a way of feeling secure and bonded with a partner," Dr. McGill explained.

He opines that there are no positives in such a relationship. "There is North American research that shows that persons who cohabit prior to getting married are more likely to be depressed or their marriages are more likely to break up than those who never cohabited," Dr. McGill pointed out.

But apart from this, children who are born in such union can also be affected.

"Because of the sort of tacit arrangement in the relationship, what holds the relationship a lot of times is fear. Fear causes anxiety and anxiety is never good for rearing children because this is transferable to children and if it is too much, it affects their ability to learn," Dr. McGill explains.

The negatives

He also takes issue with the looseness of such a relationship.

"Because of the looseness in the commitment, I feel that it is more likely that you will have more unfaithfulness, especially on the man's part, and also the introduction of STIs and HIV. Some people may think they are free of the legal ramifications if they cohabit instead of getting married," he added.

But the law has changed in that regard, according to the Property (Rights of Spouses) Act that came into effect on April 1, 2006. The new law has created a uniform definition for spouse to include a single man or single woman who lived together with a single woman or a single man for at least five years as if they were in law, husband and wife. Common-law spouses are treated in the same way as married couples, with regard to applications for declaration of interest in property.

It is important to note that the law clearly states that the two individuals should be single. A woman who lives with a married man - though he is separated - cannot claim for property.

While cohabiting may be an avenue to explore your partner, the safest bet is to seal the union with marriage.

"Marriage provides mutual protection and it becomes a safe haven for those vulnerable moments and also for the most vulnerable - the children, Dr. MacGill concludes.

*Names changed on request.

yahneake.sterling@gleanerjm.com.