Battle lines drawn Shoes on my feet, I bought it MORE AND more women are able to sing 'Independent Woman' by Destiny's Child and live it. They are the breed who have excelled in their fields and are capable of taking care of themselves. They battle every day to maintain that independence and to take control of their own lives and quite possibly their spouses'. Since fewer women are marrying for security and survival, men who thrive on control of the finances and the decision making in the home are becoming marginalised and are left to deal with it. More women are becoming independent of men. However, some men are not comfortable dealing with those who run their own show and are unapologetic about it. According to psychologist, Dr. Leahcim Semaj, women are getting more qualified and they want men who can be their social equals which puts pressure on the men who cannot measure up. "We have socialised our boys to be irresponsible. And they are of the illusion that they can hustle and make it in life." He says that traditionally, girls learn to be responsible since they are given the housework while boys are left to play. Essentially, boys end up dropping out of school earlier and getting expelled more. It is by that framework that women learn to be ambitious and attain their goals. In fact, some men feel as if they have lost their role (in the traditional sense) since some women do not need to depend on them for maintenance. And, especially if a woman has a greater earning power, the spouse experiences a sense of role reversal when he exists in his or her home. But, there are those who welcome it. Dr. Semaj points out that employees are selected in the business place by merit in an information driven context whereby the best PERSON gets the job. He said, "the men could bluff it in the past and get by, but women are the ones who apply themselves." Stories by Sonia Morgan
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